![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mokie_edomI dreamt that I was babysitting my three-year-old nephew, and took him to the park to play. I left him there, eager to get back to the things I needed to be doing (and a bit annoyed, I believe, at having interruptions and not being free to do what I'd like). I was sure he'd be fine on his own there for a little while, with plenty of other kids to play with, far from the street.
I ended up realizing, very late in the day, that he was still there and I'd forgotten to pick him up, so I strapped my things onto a bike, cursing all the while at inconveniences, and rode frantically over. As I approached I saw some of his mother's friends lying on the tennis courts, sunning themselves, and there with them was my nephew. He looked much younger (adding to the effect was the fact that he was in a diaper and onesie; he's been toilet-trained for some time now) and seemed so upset, so lost, that it immediately hit me just what I'd done earlier.
The girls called out to me as I walked over, ashamed. I picked him up to take him home, and believe one of them casually touched on it ("Oh, you're here to pick him up?") but am not sure of that. They said nothing about my leaving him there all afternoon, or how long they'd been watching him or what might have happened if they hadn't shown up, and I couldn't bring myself to say anything to anyone there, I was so ashamed of myself.
Notes and explanatory details
This dream left me badly shook up for a couple of days, for no concrete reason. Just the thought of doing something like that, I suppose. In any case, I actually held off of interpretting it in any depth because of how it affected me. A superficial take on it would be that I feel like I'm letting someone important down in an awful and selfish way.
#1: Times. When I realize that he's still at the park, it's near dark. When I approach the tennis courts, the sun is noon-bright. This has been significant before in my dreams, but I'm not sure how I'd interpret it in this one.
#2: The girls. This group of girls is primarily composed of lesbians/bisexuals, and they frequently watch my nephew on weekends and such. For some reason, the visuals in this part of the dream reminded me of the old paintings of mermaids or sirens sunning themselves on the rocks, tempting passing sailors...and I don't think it's just because I've had a crush on one or two of them in the past.
I can't help but feel that there's some important bit of message in their being there, in them specifically, but I can't put my finger on it.
#3: The park. A strange dream-twist on the local park has appeared in a few of my dreams in the past, and I believe there's a new cycle/theme settling in around it.
In one old dream, in the middle of a different cycle, I was on a side street walking toward the park, and it was wide open, green and attractive, with a strange Greek-style building waiting there for me; I was trying to make my way there, but got lost in side-streets. At the end of that dream-cycle, I ran into the park and hid in one building, before realizing that the figures that were so fearsome in the dream were powerless. In a more recent dream, the park was a zoo, with marble and rough wood structures, and water flooding in awkward places that I had to go through to get to where I needed to be...but then I realized I couldn't pass that way.
Now I'm back at the park, abandoning a responsibility and realizing that I can't do that, even if someone does show up to take the slack.
What does the change in location, from old, abandoned buildings with maze-like interiors, to the park with its rough-hewn boards and marble fountains, mean?
I ended up realizing, very late in the day, that he was still there and I'd forgotten to pick him up, so I strapped my things onto a bike, cursing all the while at inconveniences, and rode frantically over. As I approached I saw some of his mother's friends lying on the tennis courts, sunning themselves, and there with them was my nephew. He looked much younger (adding to the effect was the fact that he was in a diaper and onesie; he's been toilet-trained for some time now) and seemed so upset, so lost, that it immediately hit me just what I'd done earlier.
The girls called out to me as I walked over, ashamed. I picked him up to take him home, and believe one of them casually touched on it ("Oh, you're here to pick him up?") but am not sure of that. They said nothing about my leaving him there all afternoon, or how long they'd been watching him or what might have happened if they hadn't shown up, and I couldn't bring myself to say anything to anyone there, I was so ashamed of myself.
Notes and explanatory details
This dream left me badly shook up for a couple of days, for no concrete reason. Just the thought of doing something like that, I suppose. In any case, I actually held off of interpretting it in any depth because of how it affected me. A superficial take on it would be that I feel like I'm letting someone important down in an awful and selfish way.
#1: Times. When I realize that he's still at the park, it's near dark. When I approach the tennis courts, the sun is noon-bright. This has been significant before in my dreams, but I'm not sure how I'd interpret it in this one.
#2: The girls. This group of girls is primarily composed of lesbians/bisexuals, and they frequently watch my nephew on weekends and such. For some reason, the visuals in this part of the dream reminded me of the old paintings of mermaids or sirens sunning themselves on the rocks, tempting passing sailors...and I don't think it's just because I've had a crush on one or two of them in the past.
I can't help but feel that there's some important bit of message in their being there, in them specifically, but I can't put my finger on it.
#3: The park. A strange dream-twist on the local park has appeared in a few of my dreams in the past, and I believe there's a new cycle/theme settling in around it.
In one old dream, in the middle of a different cycle, I was on a side street walking toward the park, and it was wide open, green and attractive, with a strange Greek-style building waiting there for me; I was trying to make my way there, but got lost in side-streets. At the end of that dream-cycle, I ran into the park and hid in one building, before realizing that the figures that were so fearsome in the dream were powerless. In a more recent dream, the park was a zoo, with marble and rough wood structures, and water flooding in awkward places that I had to go through to get to where I needed to be...but then I realized I couldn't pass that way.
Now I'm back at the park, abandoning a responsibility and realizing that I can't do that, even if someone does show up to take the slack.
What does the change in location, from old, abandoned buildings with maze-like interiors, to the park with its rough-hewn boards and marble fountains, mean?
no subject
Date: 2002-10-20 11:46 am (UTC)I think I get you on the light, and it adds possibilities to the light in previous dreams, which I merely interpretted as time in a more objective sense. (Late afternoon 'golden' light = late in the scope of things, night = dark and scary time, too late.)
I thought the girls gathered could be a sort of reference to a previous event that I saw them gathered at (in actual life, that is), but it doesn't quite work for me. I'm thinking perhaps it's the thought that these girls who aren't obliged and have nothing to do with it are more responsible, better in that quality, than I am--that I drop him off and forget, and then rush back, whereas they're not even obliged to be there for him, but they all are, and all stay with him. Less a mirror and more a laser-pointer on my own irresponsibility.
The park dreams make me feel a bit like Alice--I'm not sure what anything means there yet. I mean, rotting house, mazes and tunnels, all of that I can interpret, but the park is defying any label I can stick to it just yet. Maybe that's why I'm having the dreams in the park--I need to adjust my thinking, sort of work up to a new epiphany or something.
Stupid brain...