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mokie_edomBe warned, some graphic elements ahead!
Oy, so embarrassing.
I was lying in bed with a friend; I was naked, he was clothed, and we were talking. I mentioned feeling uncomfortable but he said it didn't matter to him, and I was covered with a sheet anyway. At one point in the conversation, I looked down and realized the sheet had slipped, so I quickly adjusted it.
Later, I rolled over with my back to him and we talked for a while longer. He very hesitantly made advances toward me, but retreated again when I showed any sign of listening. I finally resigned myself to lying there and ignoring him utterly till he worked up the nerve to just stick his goddamn dick in already. When he did, he was half-limp and seemed completely unsure as to what he was supposed to be doing, but I knew if I said anything, he'd just retreat to his side of the bed and we'd have to start the whole charade again.
Notes and explanatory details
When I dream of having sex with people I know, it's usually because I have been upset or at odds with them. The sex symbolically marks for me a mental turning point regarding an individual, or an internal resolution of those conflicting feelings.
There have been times when I have made amends with someone, but it wasn't until I dreamt of having sex with them weeks later that I realized I had been holding back and waiting--for a shoe to drop, or them to spin around and laugh at me for believing they were sincere, for myself to blow up over something. It's a disturbing little cue from my brain that we really are okay with this person again, and it's alright to stand down a little.
If I have had an argument with you, I have probably also had a sex dream about you. I say this so anybody who reads this can be as uncomfortable as I am.
The dream is pretty transparent. Some weeks earlier, I had shared some private information and made myself vulnerable (naked), and was embarrassed publicly (the embarrassing reveal). Like the sex, the resolution is half-assed, and really more resignation on my part. In waking life, I realized that this friend would have to first understand or care why the incident upset me, and that wasn't going to happen. So I just accepted any apologetic overtures for what they were (don't make me point out this bit in the dream), along with the sad fact that I won't be talking quite as openly as I once did (the turned back).
Oy, so embarrassing.
I was lying in bed with a friend; I was naked, he was clothed, and we were talking. I mentioned feeling uncomfortable but he said it didn't matter to him, and I was covered with a sheet anyway. At one point in the conversation, I looked down and realized the sheet had slipped, so I quickly adjusted it.
Later, I rolled over with my back to him and we talked for a while longer. He very hesitantly made advances toward me, but retreated again when I showed any sign of listening. I finally resigned myself to lying there and ignoring him utterly till he worked up the nerve to just stick his goddamn dick in already. When he did, he was half-limp and seemed completely unsure as to what he was supposed to be doing, but I knew if I said anything, he'd just retreat to his side of the bed and we'd have to start the whole charade again.
Notes and explanatory details
When I dream of having sex with people I know, it's usually because I have been upset or at odds with them. The sex symbolically marks for me a mental turning point regarding an individual, or an internal resolution of those conflicting feelings.
There have been times when I have made amends with someone, but it wasn't until I dreamt of having sex with them weeks later that I realized I had been holding back and waiting--for a shoe to drop, or them to spin around and laugh at me for believing they were sincere, for myself to blow up over something. It's a disturbing little cue from my brain that we really are okay with this person again, and it's alright to stand down a little.
If I have had an argument with you, I have probably also had a sex dream about you. I say this so anybody who reads this can be as uncomfortable as I am.
The dream is pretty transparent. Some weeks earlier, I had shared some private information and made myself vulnerable (naked), and was embarrassed publicly (the embarrassing reveal). Like the sex, the resolution is half-assed, and really more resignation on my part. In waking life, I realized that this friend would have to first understand or care why the incident upset me, and that wasn't going to happen. So I just accepted any apologetic overtures for what they were (don't make me point out this bit in the dream), along with the sad fact that I won't be talking quite as openly as I once did (the turned back).
